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PAXbaby.comMilk for Sailor

“Sailor Avonlea was born via emergency c-section on June 13th in Las Vegas, addicted to and withdrawing from the effects of a pregnancy filled with heavy methenphetamine use, homelessness, and mental illness. After a 13 day long fight between the hospital at which she was delivered, Child Protective Services, and a large team of adoption professionals and lawyers, we were finally granted the right to adopt her and bring her home to California! We are the adoptive parents of her 18 month old full biological sibling, Lachlan, who was also born addicted to and withdrawing from meth, and while we were not anticipating adoption again so soon, when the opportunity was placed in our laps, we could not say no to another little love who would otherwise be lost to the foster system.

We have two older biological daughters whom I breastfed well into their first year; I was actually such an overproducer that I ended up donating several thousand ounces of breastmilk to a local milk bank over a period of several years. When we decided to adopt initially, I knew immediately that I wanted to feed our new baby with donor milk, as I fully believe in its amazing powers to heal the damage inflicted on a newborns tiny body and brain. When I initially approached the milk bank that I had so lovingly handed thousands of ounces of breastmilk to years prior, I found out quickly that I’d have to be made of money in order to afford their “non profit” price of $3 an ounce for breastmilk! Not satisfied with this answer, I turned to the internet, and quickly found “Human Milk 4 Human Babies” as well as “Eats and Feets.” Through both of these peer to peer sharing forums, we were able to provide breastmilk to our son for 13 months! Despite being born a drug addicted baby, he is now 100% free of health issues and is developmentally completely typical, things that I believe the power of breastmilk has made possible.

We hope to provide these benefits for our Sailor as well, especially given the abuse she suffered at the hands of so called medical professionals; for the first fourteen days of her life, she was fed formula, left in a plastic bassinet, and only held every 3 hours to be fed and changed. If she cried for milk before those 3 hours were up, she was left to cry, alone and hungry until her scheduled feeding time came along. No one was allowed to see her or even touch her for 14 days,  and when she finally was allowed to leave the hospital, she weighed a full pound less than when she was born. Our sweet girl has had a very hard time transitioning due to her drug dependency, but she IS gaining weight quickly and eating like a champ on all the milk donated by friends. Our freezer supply is quickly diminishing however, and we are feeling desperate to provide her with the nourishment she needs to heal and grow. We have witnessed firsthand the power of breastmilk to heal the damage that drug addiction, lack of prenatal care, and dangerous maternal behavior can have on a baby, and we desperately want our daughter to be the recipient of as much of this liquid life that she can.”

– Robert and Kirstin
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Please consider milk sharing with Sailor in any way possible! Her family lives in the Bay area but has set up milk drop off points in Southern California as well! Email Kirstin to set up a donation at milkforsailor@icloud.com, and thank you for keeping this amazing family in your prayers! Much love from the PAXmommies <3
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*happy babywearing*
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The post Milk for Sailor appeared first on PAXbaby.

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Have you written out birth stories for each of your children?
How soon after their birth did you write it up?

Did you find that you forgot the little details, or was it still etched upon your mind?
It is crazy how you spend 9 (ish) months (give or take), dreaming of your sweet baby – what he or she will look like, what they will sound like, how big they will be, whose eyes will they have?? What will their first carrier be?? And then… how will the birth be? Will it go “as planned”? Will there be any surprises?? Will they be early? Late? Just on time??

And then…

That moment.

When you hold your baby for the first time, breath in his sweet scent… and all the questions fade… it is like you knew them all along.

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*happy babywearing*

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The post Birthstories… appeared first on PAXbaby.

My husband, Noah, and I live in Ann Arbor, where babywearing is as common as Sophie the Giraffe. We purchased our first wraps while our babies were still happily safe and snug in my belly. When the twins were born, each weighing about 2½ pounds, our wraps sat untouched at home. Micah and Zachary struggled to breath and were hooked up to cords, wires, tubes and machines. We couldn’t wrap them when they were intubated and unstable, so we kangarooed them instead.

Prior to wearing your hospitalized baby you must:

• Understand and know how to protect each of your baby’s lines/wires/cords, etc.

• Understand how to read your baby’s monitor and be attuned to your baby’s signs of distress

• Know how to keep your baby’s airway open and unobstructed at all times
  • An open airway includes a leveled chin (not tucked down or hyperextended up) and free flow of air to mouth and nose (not pressed against skin or covered by the wrap)

• Be skilled at wrapping and unwrapping (practice on a doll or stuffed animal)

Once Zachary was stable, an expert babywearer from our community visited our family in the NICU. She carefully taught us how to safely wear Zachary, who was still attached to cords and wires. Zachary had a history of severe apnea and troubled breathing, so she was extra careful to show us how to keep his airway open. During her visit, Micah was so unstable that he could not even be held, but it was amazing to wear Zachary and have our hands free to be with Micah.

Signs your hospitalized baby may be ready to be worn:

• Does not have any breathing episodes (apnea or troubled breathing)

• Can be easily handled, moved and carried without any complications

• All Central, PICC, and other lines must be completely secured

• A baby’s readiness to be worn is all about stability and safety. Babywearing must not pose a risk or jeopardize your baby’s safety.

We fell in love with babywearing immediately. After having to leave our babies alone every night for months, and being physically separated from them for so long, we longed to feel the twin’s skin against ours. We needed to feel them close. We needed to hear them breathe. The twins needed to be wrapped up in our love. 

One of my most cherished babywearing moments was tandem wearing Micah and Zachary for the first time. Micah was still in the hospital, but stable enough to visit other floors. I wrapped up my boys and just the three of us headed down to the NICU to visit the nurses who saved their lives countless times. I felt so proud, blessed and honored to be Micah and Zachary’s mama. The nurses doted over the boys and were fascinated by our meh dai carrier! I felt like the luckiest mama ever.

While we loved using woven wraps and meh dais while the boys were in the hospital, ring slings offered the most ease, and were the safest option for the boys’ attached cords, wires and tubes.

Benefits of ring slings for hospitalized babies: 

• Quick in/out

• Easily adjustable

• Unloop the wrap from the rings without having to move or unhook any cords or wires

• Minimal material

Babywearing became an integral, beautiful part of our journey. During Micah’s extensive hospitalization, babywearing allowed me to care for both of my babies at the same time. My babies and I were desperate to be close to one another; babywearing brought us together.

I’ll always treasure our family’s first neighborhood walk at home. I wrapped up Micah, Noah wrapped up Zachary, and off we went with our dog, Benjie. We were finally at home together, a dream come true. Babywearing brought us closer and helped us make up for our months of separation. Micah tucked his head under my chin, Zachary snuggled on his daddy’s chest, and in that moment, life could not be any sweeter.

Babywearing is one of the most incredible gifts for NICU families. However, there are challenges and risks that must be carefully considered before wearing a preemie or hospitalized baby. Besides the obvious need for the infant to be stable, you may need to build confidence in your baby’s care team. Many NICUs and children’s hospitals are not familiar with babywearing. You may need to demonstrate that you have the skills and understanding to ensure your baby remains safe while being worn.

Babywearing provides NICU families with the closeness they so desperately need. If you know a NICU family, ask if you can help them learn how to wear their baby. If you are a NICU family, get a ring sling and work on building your skills so that as soon as your baby is ready, babywearing can bring the two of you together. Babywearing nurtures bonding and intimacy, while keeping the caregiver’s hands free, an invaluable, necessary gift for every NICU family!

The post Babywearing: a necessity for NICU families appeared first on PAXbaby.

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1. First thing is first. Tell us your name, and how long you have been a PAXmommy for?

Hi, I’m Alena and Ive been a PAXmommy for just over 2 years

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2. How many babies do you have?
I have 6 babies, ranging in age from 13 years old to 11 months

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3. Have you worn them all?
Yes, I have actually. I wore my first 2 in a horribly uncomfortable snugli. I didn’t even remember until I saw a pic of myself. I really got into babywearing when #3 came along and we were officially outnumbered. I had to figure out a way to juggle all 3.
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4. Who introduced you to babywearing?
I was bump buddies with a mom on babycenter. She sold me my first sling and added me to the babywearing community.
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5. You have had two preemies, right? Can you explain to us how wearing a preemie can be different than wearing a full term baby?
Many people assume that preemies are just smaller newborns. There is a lot more to a preemie than that. They are amazing little babies that still have developing to do outside the womb. In the first weeks of life, up to their due dates they need an environment as close to the womb as possible. In the NICU, their incubator provides this environment, but once you are home, imho, a wrap or ring sling is the next closest thing. They are secure against their mother’s skin, listening to her heart beat, wrapped up tightly. I will always treasure those early wearing days. Even though I mourn losing the end of my pregnancy, I am so happy we had another way to create that bond.
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6. Do you have any babywearing tips for preemie moms?
In my experience they have been extremely floppy and take longer than a full term baby to develop their core strength. This makes wearing in the first few months different than what I would recommend for full term babies. I personally do not recommend stretchy carriers. My son was 5lbs 2oz when I started wearing him and the stretchy wrap just did not support his back and spine in an optimal position.  A regular stretchy wrap would more suit a baby 8lbs or more, as the manufacturers recommend, but I did not test it out myself when he finally reached that weight 8 weeks later.
My absolute favorite carrier for a preemie is a wrap conversion ring sling. Easy to adjust and get baby in a good position without being overwhelming. 2nd favorite is a very thin woven wrap. Its best to save the meh dai’s and ssc for an older preemie once they can support their neck and core well. If you have any questions or need help wearing your preemie, please email in at help@PAXbaby.com and we would love to help.
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7. One last question, what has surprised you most about babywearing this past year?
Everyone who knows me knows that I am a huge fan of woven wraps, they really are my go-to carrier for every situation. So when I got my first Tula, I expected it to become my husband’s carrier. Well to my surprise, I reach for the Tula every single day! It’s nothing like the other ssc (soft structured carriers) I’ve tried and I absolutely love it. If you would have told me 6 months ago that I’d reach for my Tula more than my Uppy, I would have laughed. Now I have to admit that I do! This wrapper has finally found the ssc love. <3

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Thanks SO much, PAXmommy Alena for sharing a little about your babywearing journey!

Who would *you* like to see up next on the interview list???

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*happy babywearing*

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The post Introducing: PAXmommy Alena appeared first on PAXbaby.

In honor of Preemie Month:

Thank you to Alena for her Preemie Story!  I’m sure I’m not the only one who sobbed while reading this!!!  (((hugs)))

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As a mom of 4, I never ever imagined I would ever be thrown into any unknown parenting world. After 4 kids, I was pretty sure I had seen or done it all. When pregnant with my 5^th, my normal was forever changed by the birth of my first preemie at 34 weeks due to HELLP. All my “attachment parenting” styles were thrown out the window at delivery. No skin to skin contact after birth, no breastfeeding, no holding, not even touching my brand new baby. The once crowded delivery room was immediately empty and I was left alone, feeling helpless. All I could think about was the crucial bonding we were missing. How he needed me. How he must feel so alone without his mother. Once I was transferred to my room I was handed a NICU kit. In the bag I found all the stuff you would expect as a NICU mom. Some pamphlets on preemies, supplies for the breast pump and something called a snoedel. I set those aside and started up my demands for my 1^stNICU visit to see my son for the very first time. As they wheeled me in, I wasn’t sure what to expect. 34 weekers are late preemies, from what I read, he would be perfectly fine, probably in an open crib asleep waiting to be transferred back to my room.. Boy was I wrong. No one had explained anything to me. I was wheeled up to an incubator, where my precious baby was laying in just a diaper with tubes and wires and a breathing mask. I was devastated. I wanted to hold him, love him, tell him mommy was there and everything would be ok. Only I wasn’t allowed to touch him, wasn’t allowed to hold him. Again I felt as helpless as I did after delivery.

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They wheeled me back to my room. After a good cry, I grabbed the NICU bag they had previously given to me. I pulled out the snoedel and read the instructions. This doll would give him what I couldn’t while he was trapped in that incubator. He would be able to smell me, know that I’m there and that I love him. So I put the snoedel in my shirt and went to sleep. I was desperate to do something for him, anything and putting this doll in my shirt to fill it with my smell felt like something at least.

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The next morning I ran straight to the NICU. Again I was told I couldn’t hold or touch my baby. Regulating his breathing was more important than bonding. I handed the nurse my snoedel and she immediately opened his incubator and draped it over his little body. It actually covered him from his toes to his neck. Looking in his incubator and seeing this doll that I knew was covered in my scent brought me such peace. To know every breath he took, had mommy smell. The nurses even referred to it as his mommy doll.

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As the days passed and as I was able to finally hold, bond and feed my little guy, I also had to continue to leave him there. The peace and comfort of leaving him draped in the snoedel, knowing that he felt me even when I wasn’t there, really helped ease the pain of leaving him. That doll stayed on or beside him his entire NICU stay. Even under the bili lights for jaundice, the nurses made sure that doll was under his little body at least.After we came home, the snoedel stayed in his crib with him. The same way the nurses draped it over him, I draped it over him while he slept.

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My son is now 17 months old. You would never know he was a preemie by looking at him. You would also never know that we didn’t have the immediate bonding that I felt so robbed of at his birth. He adores me and is very “attached”. More attached then my other kids who never left my side, who had immediate skin to skin contact, who immediately breastfed. All the things he missed out on.  That snoedel is now tucked away safely in his baby box and has very special sentimental value I could never explain. I am so thankful my NICU provided this and was very sad to find out that most NICU’s don’t. This would be a perfect gift for a new NICU mom.  Actually perfect for any mom that needs a moment away and wants her baby to stay comforted by her scent.

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*happy {bonding} babywearing*

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The post A Preemie Story appeared first on PAXbaby.